DUCK BITCH!!

Just when you thought his approval ratings couldn’t get any lower. George Bush has once again defied convention. As a matter of fact, today as I type this, his approval ratings are so low, that they’ve fell to shoe level. He has taken Lame Duckness to an all time low.

I don’t know if you guys have seen, read or even heard. But the other day in a surprise visit to Baghdad, an irate Iraqi reporter threw some size 10 Stacy Adams at our beloved commander in chief. I guess thats what you get for a surprise visit. Maybe next time he would call ahead.

But hey, when you’ve thrown an entire country into turmoil, through military destruction, and lost of lives, all on a LIE, I don’t think you can announce your visit ahead of time. He better be lucky he got a shoe tossed at his ass instead of an IED strategically placed at the podium. That would have been ugly. As much as I dislike this man, I’m happy to see a shoe tossed instead of a bomb or something like that.

My only wish was that the shoe thrower to be more accurate. Yup, I wish he had hit him in the face, but instead he missed. Though he intended to hit him, he was off target. I guess that’s what you get for not throwing something heavy like steel toe boots or maybe some army issued Timberlands.

The thing that struck me as I watched the clip of this episode over and over as I rolled with fits of laughter, is that there was no secret service. Remember when Reagan got shot? There were like 400 secret servicemen around him at the time. Hell, one of them even took a bullet for the man. But George Bush? Depending on how you’re looking at it, no such luck.

To me, it would seem that there would have been at least one brave white secret service dude (I’m sorry, but the brothas aren’t that loyal) who would have dove in front of the shoe. If not that, he would have at least scooped up the president and whisked him away to safety. But yet, none of that happened. Instead, our Idiot In Chief was allowed to continue speaking. He even took this embarrassment and turned it into a comedy routine. I really would have liked to see what he would have had to say if that pissed off Iraqi decided to bare his ass and “moon” him on national TV.

Memo to the secret service: Umm, failure to do your job under the presidency of Barack Obama the likes of this shoe incident could possibly lead to loss of employment.

Its been reported that the Iraqi shoe assassin, had been recently arrested and tortured. See how that torture shit can come back to haunt you Mr. Bush? I’m also pretty sure that he wasn’t too happy that his relatives had been killed as a result of the occupation either. For that, I guess our president can say that the surge worked. If it didn’t, lord knows it wouldn’t have been a shoe thrown. It could have been worse.

It may have been a rock. Those Iraqi’s are known to be the shit when it comes to throwing rocks at tanks. I’m pretty sure as experienced as they are with the ethnic infighting, they wouldn’t have missed. However, I’m glad that it was a shoe, and that Bush is alive today so that I can laugh at his ass. Its better to laugh at him after all of this instead of the country being thrust into mourning. Having to hear people talk about how GREAT he was would make me puke.

I gotta give him credit though, he has some quick reflexes. Did you see how fast he ducked, and avoided being hit? I could be wrong, but I think he picked up that “Matrix” move and added it to his repertoire after Hurricane Katrina, just in case one of those angry Negroes got brave. I don’t know, but I know somebody needs to nominate that Iraqi reporter as Time Magazine Man of The Year. Just like my fat ass, I can’t help but to think that somewhere in hell, there’s a guy with a thick mustache, dressed in military style gear who is laughing his ass off right now.