Tiger Woods quits golf? Oh well, they’ll have a new n*gga next year

Tiger’s latest “press release” about his “indefinite break” from golf is the dumbest thing ever. People may think it is noble of him to put his family first at a time like this given all that has happened. But the truth to me is that this is a well timed move all in an attempt to draw sympathy and shift focus from what we know about him right now. I think his decision especially reeks of sheer arrogance given the fact that he could have stood up as a man two weeks ago and faced this head on, rather than lie or attempt to dodge the bullets, but hey that’s just me. Yep, great timing there good buddy!

First he said it was a private matter and that all the chatter around the internet about his “infidelity” were lies. Uh-huh, and I almost forgot to mention that his wife was courageous is using that golf club to bash the windows of his Escalade and pull him out from that twisted burning wreckage after he drove off a cliff on accident. Yep, after all of that he ran with that “stay the fuck outta my business,” line. Now mind you, this Negro did all of this all on his website and never once with a mic in his face in the presence of any journalist.

What, did he think this shit was just gonna go away? I’m just sayin’, he had to be a fool to think that some chick wasn’t gonna save one of his used condoms to use as evidence someday should the word ever get out or she ended up on Maury – you know how Maury LOVES black babies. Oh I forgot, condoms gave him an adverse skin condition so he never wore them – yep, blame it on the latex Eldrick. And why do we now know this? Because as I said his punkass didn’t stand up and like a man and say “Yeah I did it, and I’m sorry,” at the outset.

Ultimately it would have been a move that would have prevented the three ring circus that his life had become in the public eye as the naked body count of women and affairs continues to rise. Oh and let’s not forget to mention the nude photos of his little putter that are in the possession of some porn rag after he so wisely sent them to one of his concubines using a camera phone. Which now that I think about it, that may be the real reason he decided to take an “indefinite break” from the sport of golf.

I get the feeling that sooner or later some guy is gonna come out with similar allegations of hot butt-naked condomless sex with Tiger! Yep, and though golf isn’t exactly the like the NFL locker room  as far as professional sports go. It’s gonna be hard to stay focused or even play 18 holes when there are women flashing you titties and gay guys filing paternity suits while you try to win that coveted Pink Jacket year in and year out.

Why doesn’t he just come out and face the music? Has anybody actually seen the guy within the last two weeks other than the people at the hospital where his mother-in-law was rushed recently after falling the fuck out? Oh yeah, rumor has it, she collapsed at his home after flying in from Sweden only to realize that her daughter was married to a Black man. It’s a good thing his last name is Woods and not Simpson.

So now what are you gonna do now Tiger? Are you gonna continue to sit down when you pee as per your wife’s instruction now laid out in your newly renegotiated pre-nup? Or are you gonna finally face the world via the very media who made you the billion dollar corporate entity that you are. Nope, instead you’re gonna walk away with the hopes that your “transgressions” would be forgotten.

Well, did Bill Clinton walk away after America found about about him spewing his jizz on some fat chicks dress? Did Michael Vick walk away after spending time in prison for putting a sleeper hold a few poodles? No they didn’t! Hell, even Lionel Ritchie’s high yellow ass made a comeback after his wife beat him down and we all found out about it. But not you Tiger, you’re intent on taking the path of least resistance as any punk would do. Shit, why don’t you at least get on Oprah and cry your heart out before walking away?

Trust me, if he does that all will be forgiven. Oh well, I’m sure him leaving though sad for his fans is a huge welcome to his competitors on the golf course. Maybe some of them can win every now and then as he sits at home as he indulges in internet porn since some are using the excuse that he’s a sex addict; what a load of crap – sex addict my ass. At the end of the day Tiger’s a very wealthy guy and he’ll be just fine; taking a break won’t hurt him financially as much as it would his reputation.

For all I know this may be a good move when you consider that his sponsors and maybe the PGA themselves would be begging him to come back which ultimately raises his stock. But don’t let that weigh too heavy on your brain there Mr. Woods, because like my man IceCube said back in the day “They’ll have a new nigga next year.” So watch ya back V.J. Singh before they do you like King – Rodney King, Martin Luther King, and all the other goddamn Kings from Africa.

*Pic courtesy of Denmark Vesey