BARACK OBAMA: THE JORDAN EFFECT


We’ve heard so much about “The Bradley Effect” in the weeks prior to the presidential election. It was widely discussed in the media that it could lead to an Obama loss. Well, it didn’t happen. And now, I hear the media pundits discussing “The Reverse Bradley Effect”. In other words, instead of white people going against their disclosure to vote for the Black candidate, they decided to do just that. I suspect that there were quite a few people who swore not to ever vote for the Black guy decided to vote for him once inside of the booth unknownst to their friends. Boy I would have loved to be inside the head of one of those people when they voted.

But something the media hasn’t discussed is whats known as “The Jordan Effect”. Never heard of it huh? Well aren’t you glad I’m here to educate you. Remember Michael Jordan? You know, ole number 23 himself? You know, the guy who played for the Chicago Bulls back in the day? Yeah, the guy who arguably changed the whole game? Yes, that Michael Jordan. Just like Michael Jordan, Barack Obama has changed the political game similar to how Jordan did the NBA. The irony of this, is that they both represented Chicago. Until Jordan came along players were not receiving paid endorsements like Mike. His “brand” revolutionized marketing, and I could remember when Jordan’s face and name was everywhere.

I suspect Barack Obama is gonna be the same way. Not that he’s gonna do commercials, but his popularity will leave a lasting effect worldwide. Not only that, but his campaign has set a new standard in politics. It will be forever studied, and adopted from here out by everyone running for office, including the kid who wants to be kindergarten class president. Lets be honest, you don’t raise $700,000,000 for your campaign and not expect others to come along and duplicate, copy or bite your style. Ask Kobe Bryant, that’s what he did when he came into the league, he wanted to be the next Michael Jordan. He could have been, but an ill timed romp in the sack with a trashy white girl sure as hell killed any hopes of that.

The one thing that bugs me about Obama’s success, is the “Jordan Effect”. No, I’m not afriad of Obama becoming too popular and saturating the market. Not that at all. As a matter of fact, if anything, by him being the first Black president, his face should be plastered everywhere. Shit, if I could have it my way, I’d put his face on a $20 bill right now where it would forever stay. The thing that bugs me though, are all the people having kids from here on out. I’m afraid that everybody is gonna wanna name their kid Barack or even Obama. Thats the tacky shit that I’m not looking forward to. Don’t be surprised when you hear someone at the grocery store say something like, “Get over here Obamashay!” Or, “Barackeema stop hitting your brother!!”

Just like when Jordan became popular, everybody started naming their kids Jordan. There are probably thousands of kids running around here named Jordan who can’t even dunk. That’s the real tragedy folks. You give a kid the name Jordan, buy him a copy of “Space Jam”, and then you expect him to be able to dunk. You expect the kid to become a basketball star, but instead the kid grows up to be fat and lazy and wants nothing to do with sports. Hell, when you look at the kid now, you probably wished you could give him back to the doctor that smacked him on the ass when he was born. You wanted Jordan the athlete, and all you got was Jordan the kid who still has shit stains in his draws because he so trifflin he doesn’t wipe his ass properly. How’s that for a let down?

The same thing is gonna happen with all these little Barack’s and Barackiesha’s of the world. People are gonna be all over the country naming their kids and placing these great expectations on them because of their names. Not that having great expectations for your kids are bad. But damn, at least realize that giving them a name has nothing to do with success. Well, that’s unless you name them something like Mercedes or Sunshine, and she grows up to be a stripper. Or maybe even Nightrain, the little boy who grows up to become a featured act at those private strip shows for fat chicks at the VFW. That’s the only way I’d say that would work. But other than that, the name you give to your kids are not indicative of them becoming something great in life. Believe you me, I know a couple cats named Martin after Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. who are still wondering if they’ll ever have a dream. Hell, some of them are still living at home with mom at 40yrs old!

You people are not gonna see it now, or realize that what I say is true. Most likely, you’re gonna see it maybe 15yrs from now. Hell, I’m willing to bet, that Barack is gonna become the standard name given to all mixed kids from here on out. But if you doubt what I say, just think of all the slacker kids of some of your friends. I’m pretty sure somewhere in there, a few of them are named Jordan. And I’m willing to bet that even though they wear $150 Nikes, they don’t have their own commercials on TV, nor can they dunk. Lets just hope the young Barack’s of the future don’t grow up to be crackheads. Or worse, get busted cheating on their wives with trashy white women in hotels.

Hopefully there’s a reverse Jordan Effect.