How You Gon’ Leave Before You Dance With Me?

The above title to this post is actually a line from my man Mos Def’s song of the hip hop classic “Black On Both Sides”. This is one of my favorite hip hop albums of all time as is Mos Def the entertainer. The line come from the song “Ms. Fat Booty” which tells the tale of boy meets girl in the average nightclub in anywhere USA. In the song he meets this woman and is smitten by her beauty; he even proclaims playfully that she had an ass so fat that you can see it from the front.

Well, to make a long story short, he fell in love with her, they had a fling and in the end she broke his heart. In other words dude was sick; yup, shorty put in on him seriously like that; watch the video at the end of this post. Now this song was made back in the late 90s. And this is why I was surprised to read over at – my number one source for celebrity entertainment news and gossip – that my man met a stripper in the club back in 2005, and married her after only knowing her for two days. Uh huh, and now dude refuses to sign the divorce papers for the last two years. Shit, Mos Def’s Umi told him to shine his light on the world, but I wonder what she would have to say about this. Of course the marriage never worked; was it supposed to? His wife filed for divorce only two months after the wedding. In an upcoming documentary called “Rapper Wives” on E, this story and many more are exposed.

Check it out:

Now a part of me thinks that Mos Def should have known better. I’m thinking that when you’re an artist in the industry you have to be leery of situations such as this. But then again I don’t know where or what he was going through at the time. I mean clearly this woman has some issues as a result of her upbringing – ok, yeah, so everyone has issues; I’m not picking on this woman. However, when you barely know someone and marry them after two days of meeting them this is what you get. Would I have married her only after knowing her for two days? Hell fuck no I wouldn’t, and I don’t care how fat the booty is or just how fine she is, I will never do something like that.

Yeah whatever RiPPa you know you lyin.

Ok yeah, I might be lyin’; my bad, I forgot, I did the same thing. Well, see, I got married to a woman that I barely knew as well. I didn’t do it in two days; in my case I knew her for six months. In retrospect, it was a bad move. For two reasons: 1) I met her in a nightclub just like Mos Def, and yes the ass was fat, and well…2) I was only 24yrs old and fresh out of college; looking back I was too young. Yes, now that I am a lot older and wiser I can say this. So would I have done differently? Of course I would, but looking back it’s always easy to say something like that. After all, hindsight is 20/20, no?

Our marriage managed to last 9yrs; the last two we were separated pending a divorce. A lot of what I dealt with and went through during the marriage without giving much detail could have and should have been avoided. In other words, if I hadn’t taken my ass out to the club that one night in question when I was 23yrs old none of it would have happened. Two days after meeting her we had sex, and I ain’t gonna front, I was hooked. Yeah, I was running around with my nose wide open. Shit I cancelled my other stable of women just because. Shit, I had everything else I could ever want in life at the time with the exception of “the one”.

I guess kinda like Mos Def, back then I was quite the catch, and without enough thought I allowed myself to get reeled in. I must admit that although it could have been avoided, it was a lesson learned, and well worth it. You see, unlike Moss Def, I learned and decided not to make the same mistake in my older years as he did. You know that whole “fool me once shame on you” thing? Now I can say that I am happily married, for a second time, to a woman unlike the little girl the little boy that was me fell for a long long time ago. I’m not one for giving out unsolicited advice, but I can’t help but to tell you that it’s not a good idea marrying someone you meet in the club.