The Crying Game: When Men Cry While Naked

Ok people, lets go back to the debauchery, and dysfunction that is our daily lives. Yep, lets talk about sex. I was talking to my homie Fungke Blak Chik the other night about her recent dating escapades when she was updating me on a situation with a fake ass lying ass onetime Negro suitor. Well, not to put all of his or her business out there, but she’s no longer seeing this lame. My bad, I shouldn’t’t call him a lame because I don’t know the guy personally, plus he’s not here to defend himself. Plus, like I said, I’m not going to put anybody’s business out there….

But anyway, dude has been acting shady, and pretty much has been in hiding since “hooking up” with her. Now, from what she was telling me, dude cried when he finally got a piece. He got a piece of what RiPPa? You know? A piece? You know booty? Pussy? Sex?!! Damn I hate slow ass people. Anywhichaway, yes when dude hit it he cried. I wouldn’t know, but allegedly, according to my girl, it’s just that damn good. I don’t know about any of the fellas reading this, but isn’t that some scary shit? I mean, isn’t it a scary thought of hittin’ a chick off, and then having to cry afterwards? I mean, I don’t know about any other guy, but I don’t ever want to have sex with a woman that was so good that she made me cry when it was over.

Now women would probably see this as a good thing and no big deal. Actually, I think some women would welcome a man breaking down in tears when they first have sex. To those women, it would be a form of validation of their prowess between the sheets. I’m sorry, but if I was a woman, a nigga crying after I gave him some would be a signal that he’s possibly crazy. Ok, so he may not be actually crazy or deranged, but crying during or after sex makes him a potential crazy stalker dude, and I would be concerned. The last thing you (or I) would need, is a guy jumping out of the bushes when I got home from work or wherever wondering if he could hit it again, and where the hell I’ve been. So yes, if it were me, I’d cut dude off in a heartbeat after that.

However, I know how some of you women love keeping a crazy dude around. So yeah, I could understand you continuing to see him and you telling your friends that he really loves you. Umm, that dude doesn’t love you. He’s crazy and he’s trying to own you. Didn’t you get the memo? Abraham Lincoln said that whole slavery owning people thing isn’t happening, or allowed in this country anymore. Now if you like being chained up or handcuffed during sex, that’s a different blog, and your bedroom. The point I’m trying to make is that some of these guys do this crying thing in an attempt to run game.

Yes, when a man/woman cries after sex, what he/she is doing is trying to convince you that you’re the best thing since pants with pockets. Ok so maybe better than that, but you get the picture. You’re supposed to devote yourself entirely to that person just because you made them cry. Yes, you and your sex organ is supposed to be on sympathy auto-pilot, and give in to their every intentions. That’s right, and you wonder why some of these couples end up on Divorce Court on TV embarrassing their family members as they argue over who gets the George Foreman Grill. They usually do because one of them fell for the crying game.

My 18mth old daughter pulls that shit when I get on to her for doing something wrong. She runs to me with open arms crying so that I can pick her up. I’m not gonna lie, I often fall for it, but it’s only because she’s a baby. Having said that, I don’t think any grown person should fall for that same shit in a relationship; or most definitely after sex. I’m not going to say that it is completely unnatural to be emotional and cry ever. All I’m saying is, to be careful about the tears you fall for. I did that once with a woman, and all I’ll say for now, is that it didn’t turn out too well, and yes, she did have some issues which were unhealthy. For all I know, this dude did my girl a favor of crying and falling off the face of the earth, and it’s a good thing she didn’t fall for that game.