If you’re still a little salty after watching CNN’s Black in America documentary last year, you’ve probably already made up your mind not to watch part 2 this year. I watched it last year like everybody else, and yes, I was somewhat disappointed. However, unlike my wife and the rest of you ungrateful Negroes, I am going to watch this years installment. What follows is my attempt to convince you ungrateful Negroes of just why you should watch Black in America 2:
10) They’re still Black people in America: Nope, we didn’t all go back to Africa, nor did we or our circumstances change in post-racial America. Black kids were thrown out of a Philly pool a couple weeks ago.
9) Our president is Black: Surely you wouldn’t want to miss out on all the gleeful commentary on the state of Black America when we have our first Black president? Him being the catalyst for hope and change should be enough to convince yourself that CNN is going to do a good job. Hopefully they’ll offer solutions unlike him of course. I’m sure he’ll be watching.
8) Watch parties: There are going to be watch parties all over the country. So if by chance you don’t have cable anymore because they’ve finally caught up to your cable stealing ass you have no excuse. Besides, wouldn’t it be cool to get together with fellow Americans for such an event? Surely you don’t want to miss out on the spades tournament afterward, do you? It’s gonna be like the inauguration all over again minus the cold weather.
7) It’s CNN and not Fox News Channel: Yes, you should have nothing to fear when it comes to the negative depictions of Black people in America. Can you imagine if this were a documentary put together by the good folks over at the house that Rupert Murdoch built? There will be no commentary from Jesse Lee Peterson or Juan Williams on this one folks. That alone should be encouragement enough. Besides, CNN is like the United Nations when it comes to it’s employees; there are more people of color on that network than Fox and MSNBC put together.
6) This is not a show for White people: Contrary to popular belief, this show is for America and not meant to be one of those “look at the Negroes” carnival sideshow attractions. If that’s what you think, obviously you haven’t seen the dysfunction that is Maury or a Jerry Springer episode. No, there will be no paternity test results read on this one.
5) There’s no “White in America” documentary: Lets face it, if there were a true documentary which chronicled the White experience, Negroes would be mad. It’s not that we don’t know what it means to be White in America. It’s that a show like that would be a slap in the face. And I don’t think America needs a repeat of what happened when the Roots miniseries first aired back in the day. Yep, there’s no need for random White people to get beat up over a TV show. That said, Black people should be glad that this is about them and not White folks. Yep, America is too scared to air such a program.
4) Soledad O’Brien: The sister is fine and there’s not much more to be said than that. Other then the fact that she is Black, intelligent, and qualified to ask the right questions. And lets be real: not even Oprah Winfrey would do a show on what it is to be Black in America. Oh, and did I mention she’s fine?
3) You don’t have anything else to do: Yes, the program is playing on Wednesday and Thursday night. That said, you don’t have shit else to do and no reason to miss either night. Unless you’re a Jehovah’s Witness and have to go hangout at the Kingdom Hall on Thursday night. I mean seriously: basketball season is over, and football is yet to start. There are no sporting events getting in the way of getting your family together to watch this.
2) Solutions: I get the idea that this years offering may be heavy on solutions unlike last year. I think for most people this was a problem. There was a presentation of one extreme to the next with not much middle ground or solutions. It was either you’re well do do, or extremely poor and about to lose your home. This year I believe much of the discussion will be about moving forward and inspiring.
1) You watched the BET awards this year: Do I really have to explain this one? The fact that you gave your time to that station is an insult to your ancestors and you owe it to them to watch Black in America 2; it’s only right. It is because I think somewhere down south a Black person is lynched everytime 106th & Park is aired.
So there you have it. I hope you folks who read this will now at least take the time to tune in and watch the show. I have faith in CNN and this years show and I doubt that they won’t let me down. I wish I could say the same for everybody else. But lord knows us Negroes are never happy. Yes, and it is with saying that, that you folks know that I reserve the right to tear CNN a new asshole if they do in fact disappoint me after I watch the show.
Are you gonna watch it?