Have you ever heard the exclamation “its colder than a witches titty”? Well, just exactly how cold is that? I mean, I don’t know any witches nor have I met any guys that have actually sucked on a witches titty. And who is the guy that had sex with a witch, and why in the world did he even do it?

Better yet, why in the hell did he even tell anybody? I’ve had 4am after the club drunk sex before but sheesh…a witch? Next time you hear anybody say that, just slap the shit out of them.

That’s why weather men on TV should be more precise in the winter. Instead of giving me temperatures, just get to the point, and be specific…

“If you go out side you’ll be freezing your balls off!!”

That’s what should be said. That way I’ll have an idea just how cold it actually is. Screw you and your wind chill factor weather man, I know its cold, and like any warm blooded man, I can actually say that I’m freezing my balls off and actually mean it when the temperature drops. Lets be honest, when it gets cold, I mean really cold, I seriously doubt knowing the wind chill factor matters. Its not like I’m gonna walk outside wearing a wife beater and shorts when its 20 degrees just because I don’t know what it feels like with the wind blowing.

I really don’t think women really understand what that means, to be freezing your balls off. Allow me to explain. In the winter GOD looked out for us men. He strategically made the BALLS the warmest part on a man’s body. If you don’t believe me ask any random dude. If you’re still not convinced. Do some scientific research. Take one cold day in your city to do a survey. Take a random sample of 100 men, actually you don’t need that many….but ask them if you can “cup” their balls in the name of science. You gotta say “in the name of science” or else I think you can pick up a charge or something. Only then ladies, I’m sure you’ll be convinced as to the temperature of the balls in the winter.