So the other night I roll out of bed somewhere around 3am to take a piss. My TV was on as always and I saw this Susan Boyle chick being interviewed by Larry King. There was some other guy on there who was also British. From what I caught in between wiping the cold from my eyes and stumbling in the dark, he was a judge on the show “Britain’s Got Talent”.
You know what? I don’t get the big deal about this lady. Ok, so I get the point that she looks like the love child of Rodney Dangerfield and the character “Fiona” from the Shrek movies. Yes I get that, but damn, just because she looks the way she does doesn’t mean she can’t sing or do anything else. I get the feeling that from here on out anything she does will leave people in awe. She can fix a ham sammich and probably bring people to tears just because she’s photgenically challenged. I mean what was she supposed to sound like?
I mean seriously, has anyone noticed that most female singers in the industry are low on talent but high on sex appeal? All jokes aside, name one ugly female artist with a record deal. Fuck, Amy Winehouse is a crackhead and weighs probably less than my 1yr old, and she has a recording contract, and hell she’s from England. Are people in awe of her when she sings? I mean nobody has interviewed with her and said, “You know for a crackhead you sure are talented, amazing and inspirational!” Nope nobody ever says that. But I had to wake up in the middle of the night and see another singer from Britain being heralded as such.
Well she’s an inspiration RiPPa.
I’m sorry; a person with one leg competing in the Olympics is inspirational. Who exactly is she inspiring?!! Listen, when you wear an ugly dress, neglect your hair, and refuse to shave your bushy eyebrows and look the way you do, that’s on you. Trust me, there’s nothing inspirational about that. So what’s the big deal already? I mean, if she were an auditioning contestant on American Idol, would she have gotten this much attention? I’d love to hear what you think about that one. Me? I’ll be honest; I doubt they would have even selected her to go to Hollywood. I’ve seen some women who could blow audition but yet they are turned down because of their look.
One thing I know for sure is that Britain may have talent but it sure has ugly, and this woman is just another one in a long line of them. Hello?!! There is Mick Jagger, Ozzy Osborne, Ringo Star, anyone remember these guys? I could go on and on, but I guess not. The messed up thing is that already all this attention has gone to this woman’s head. You know how an ugly muthafucka gets the big head when he/she is in the spotlight, right? Yeah, this Susan chick has turned down an interview with Oprah Winfrey. Yes, that Oprah Winfrey; uh huh, the one who beat Harpo’s ass.
She wanted to do an interview with the new singing sensation on her show but Susan has refused. If she was really trying to make it big, she would have definitely interviewed with Oprah. Instead, she’s been on the talk show circuit and interviewed with Larry “The Crypt Keeper” King on CNN. Oh well, whether she wins the competition or not, the whole world knows about her, and I’m sure she could make a living appearing in Shrek the Broadway version. Who knows, she just may finally be kissed; never mind that it’s by an Ogre.