Wait, is Barack Obama Gay? Uhm, is He Still Black?!!

Last week after Pres. Obama’s made his “evolution” on gay marriage public, my initial thought was: great, now they’re going to say that Obama is gay, and all gay people are now going to vote for him because of it. You know, pretty much in the same way all black people voted for him in ’08 because he was black? Yeah, that tired meme that a black folks — except for Clarence Thomas and Michael Steele — voted for Obama because he was black; and, that he was gonna give all of us reparations for slavery along with a 50% off coupon for life, for fried chicken purchases on the continental United States. Yep, so now the talk is that all gay people — even the ones that are illegal aliens — are going to vote for Obama this year because of his personal stance that members of the LGBT community should be afforded equal protection under the law when it comes to marriag.

Uh uh, never mind the economy, or the fact that gay people are unemployed and unable to afford stuff like glitter or whatever else “the gays,” happen to purchase; no, never mind that. Instead, what’s important and on everybody’s mind is that Obama wants to make it legal for gays to marry. Keep in mind that this was just his personal opinion and no legislation has been advanced to suggest this becoming a reality. Nope, all that matters is that gays are gonna be married with the full blessings of Obama; and, straight people (whether married or single) will now have to deal with the hassle of not being able to get out of their driveways because they’re being blocked in by the gay married couple giving each other head in a parked car. Yep, forget the whole equal protection under the law thingy in the U.S. Constitution; shit, that’s an old-ass piece of paper anyway.

I mean, who wants to have gay people tossing salads within 500 feet of a school, right? So yeah, as absurd as it sounds, that’s what marriage equality means in the minds of many. That plus the idea that straight people will now have to contend with the obvious embarassment of being placed in a ompromising position, by a gay person getting down on one knee and offering them a marriage proposal in public. Yeah, straight people often get married for the wrong reasons, who wants to add a straight person being hitched to a gay person and having to act gay to  the list.

Yes, this is what people fear; and, it’s the reason there’s so much talk . And you better believe, as far as the politics of fear goes, as much as most try to deny it, this will have an impact on this years general elections. How significant an impact? I’m not sure. However, I am sure that these fears will be exploited by the many ignoramuses  among us over the next several months. Hell, you see how they’re already trying to play divide and conquer by using the black vote, right? Yep, they’re using the black church to divide the black electorate by making same-sex marriage the latest wedge issue. Smart move especially when you think about how black preachers are bent on not pissing off white Jesus in hopes that he would allow blacks and whites to drink from the same fountain if Negroes are allowed in heaven. Yes, it’s that deep for some of the members of the black clergy and the Sunday Communion Kool Aid drinkers they lead. So much so that I’ve heard that some of them are definitely going to sit this election cycle out. I’ve heard from good source that in one particular Obama For America campaign office, people are talking about walking out on the campaign.

Look, I happen to take civil rights pretty damn seriously. As such, lemme be clear when I say this: any black person who is pulling their support for Pres. Obama solely on his feelings on gay marriage deserves to be picking cotton for free in one hundred and ten degree temperature. I don’t care how ignorantly you argue that gay rights and the struggle for civil rights by black folk are different. The truth is: black folks do not hold a patent on civil rights. Yes there was a civil rights movement, but the idea that it was made up of nothing but black folk, and strictly for the betterment of black folk, is rather silly. It is especially foolish when you consider the fact that the biggest beneficiary of Affirmative Action policy were white women. But no, don’t tell that to some of my Neo-Negro cousins who posit opinions to advance their brand of pseudo-intellectualism, which they’d call racist if they were offered by white folks in spaces opened up by conversations of full equality for racial minorities here in Amuur’cuh. That’s right, err’body wanna be black, but don’t want nobody else to be black.

So, lemme get this right: gay people can now openly serve in the military and give their lives to protect our asses, pay taxes, vote, and be protected  by all that other shit in the constitution, except for the concept of equal protection under the law as afforded by the same 14th Amendment that made black folks citizens of this country and fucking human? And why? Because “Jesus” ain’t down with that? Shit, why even have a Congress (or gov’t) when all we can do is get on our knees and pray as American citizens for manna to fall from the sky so everything would be alright? Oh that right, the whole “separation of church and state,” and that “religious freedom” thing the 1st Amendment affords us isn’t real, right? Hell, you’d think church folk were mad ’cause Obama said churches are going to have to start paying taxes or something. Shoot, whatever happened to giving Caesar what is his?

It’s good to know that common sense still lives in the church…