So I rolled over and looked at my wife this morning and wondered to myself, “How did these kids get here, and why aren’t we having sex right now?” Ah yes, Valentine’s Day, the day for lovers; and, it’s on a Sunday. Here we are on the morning after the guy who sells roses in the club made off like a fat rat with enough to put one of his kids through college. The morning where in-spite of said roses being bought, and alcohol consumed, someone has to skip out at 5am from the bed of a stranger hoping to slip back into the house without his or her wife or husband noticing.
Here we are on the day that Jamaal, the brother who hasn’t seen his kids in more than a few months, makes nice with his “baby momma” and try to get back in good under the guise of love. When the real truth is that he’s just trying to get a cut of that tax refund check because, well, that earned income tax credit comes in handy. Valentine’s Day, the day of love, the day when hate reigns supreme birthed by the happiness of people you know. The day when a woman’s best friend begrudgingly utters the line, “So what he bought you a ring for Valentine’s Day; he ain’t shit noway. You lucky you my girl that I’m even telling you that he fucked me last week.” But hey, every cloud has a silver lining (except for the mushroom shaped ones, which have a lining of Iridium & Strontium 90). And sure you may say that there’s more fish in the sea, but who wants to go out with a fish?
Yes, Valentine’s Day, the day that I wonder if as the older I get the less romantic I am. Of course Mrs. RiPPa says that I’m the same hopeless romantic that she married with whom she has fathered beautiful children. But only if I can see it, but only if I can feel it. If only our kids weren’t piled up in the bed on top of the both of us this morning so I can get some. If only my 15yr old daughter, and my beautiful wife didn’t forget to mention that somebody’s man-child was walking around in glee knowing that he is the boyfriend of my beautiful daughter. If only one of them didn’t think it wasn’t information important enough to be shared with dad.
Yep, it’s become obvious that I’m getting older, and this would explain the reason why I’m in love with the TNT television show Men Of A Certain Age. But then again, it would also explain why I’ve been listening to Once In A Lifetime by The Talking heads on repeat for the last 45 minutes as I ask myself, well, how did I get here. Either way, I guess all of this gives me comfort in knowing that I have grown up, and that I refuse to live my life vicariously through the dating exploits of my single friends. After all, life is the same as it ever was, right? You know, living in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife, with kids that will interrupt sexy time.
Yes, life is great!