But They Make It Look So Romantic!

by Joanna (JuJuBe)

Ah, yes, unrequited love, a woman’s undying devotion to a man who barely knows she exists, that is the stuff of romantic epics like Les Miserables!! If only it were as touching and beautiful in real life! As someone who has spent many years pining after one man or another, only do be rejected for someone else, I can commiserate with Eponine, the chick who is in love with the revolutionary Marius.

Honestly, when I watched Les Miserables, I had no desire to see love bloom between Marius and Cosette, the chick that he fell in “love at first sight” with. Nah, I thought to myself that he needed to be with his home girl Eponine, because she was the one who REALLY had his back! I mean damn, she even hooked him up with Cosette, and I KNOW she did not want to see the two of them together! But she really loved that dude and wanted to see him happy, even if it wasn’t with her! See, I gotta give her credit, because while I will go out of my way for the man I am feeling in many ways, helping him bag another bitch is NOT one of them! Eponine, though, she did what he asked without letting on that it was killing her inside. Talk about a down ass bitch!

Now, I am not going to lie, when I listen to the music from Les Mis, I cry. But it is not because I think it is such a beautiful, romantic story. Nah, I cry because I AM Eponine! I know exactly how she feels chasing after some dude that really does not deserve all that she does for him! Sadly, thanks to Les Mis, I actually have this fantasy that the man I am in love with will come to me and hold me and finally tell me he is in love with me as I lay dying! See, Eponine decides to be a spy for the revolutionary students out of her love for Marius. And, after delivering a message that could save her man’s life and the lives of his comrades, she is shot. There is this big romantic death scene where she is finally able to be in the arms of her one true love.

Wow.. I cannot even tell you how many times I have imagined the man I am in love with right now coming to me as I lay dying after performing some act of bravery in order to save him. Yes, I really imagine him promising “But you would live, JuJuBe, dear God above, if I could heal your wounds with words of love….”, and me telling him with one of my last dying breaths that it is enough to know that “I’ll sleep in your embrace at last”.

Um, yeah, so anyway, I think shows like Les Mis are wonderful stories for women who are married and living the American dream with 2 kids, a dog and a yard surrounded by a white picket fence. But for us chicks who are chasing behind some man who couldn’t gives a rat’s ass about how we REALLY feel, this type of story is just more fodder for our fantasy land lunacy!

Unrequited love LOOKS good on the stage, in movies and in books. It seems oh so romantic for a woman to be willing to give her all to the object of her affection, but trust me, in real life, it only leads to heartbreak and tears!

And really, who the fuck would be talking about “a little fall of rain can hardly hurt me now” as she is bleeding to death anyway??? Damn, that bitch Eponine is even crazier than me!