Thank God! Bruce Jenner Still Has a Penis!!!!

So, about this Diane Sawyer interview with Bruce Jenner, did “he” really say that he’s 100% heterosexual? I mean, he is transgender, right?

He identifies as a woman, but he says he isn’t attracted to men sexually.

So, like, is he a fake lesbian now?

Bruce Jenner was once hailed as the greatest athlete in the world and later became a reality television star with one of the world’s most famous families. Now, the former Olympian is revealing a secret that has caused him turmoil for decades.

“For all intents and purposes, I’m a woman,” Jenner told ABC’s Diane Sawyer in an exclusive interview that aired Friday in a special two-hour edition of ABC News’ “20/20.”

“People look at me differently. They see you as this macho male, but my heart and my soul and everything that I do in life — it is part of me,” Jenner, 65, said. “That female side is part of me. That’s who I am.”

Of course, this post sounds transphobic and could be interpreted as me just being ignorant. However, I’m going to need someone to educate me of this. How do you wake up one day as a man, then decide to transform into being a woman, but you still like women and consider yourself to be heterosexual? Hey, I’m all for someone choosing to identify as someone from the opposite sex. In fact, personally, I think that someone being transgender speaks to the greatness that is America in the context of freedom, apple pie, and some other often repeated third thing that celebrates America. But I’m confused, y’all. I won’t dare go as far as saying or to suggest that Bruce Jenner is as confused about his sexuality as I am. But hey, can you help me out with this?

Perhaps at the end of the day, whether Bruce Jenner has a penis or not doesn’t really matter. After all, it’s not like he’s currently anyone’s favorite male pornstar; or, a male athlete still competing at the Olympic level. If he was, like his current story, it would be fodder for media outlets for all the wrong reasons. Why? Because it would be kind of messed up if Bruce Jenner had to return his Olympic medals because he lied and pretended to be a man when he kicked ass by beating male athletes back in the day. Which, wouldn’t be a stretch considering the number female athletes like Caster Semenya, who have had their gender questioned and tested, because of their success.

But beyond all of that drama, what he’s doing is cool. As some say, it shines a light on the choices many transgender folks make – many of them are life altering in more ways than one. However, as awesome as this all may be for the LGBT community and their allies, what sucks is that Bruce Jenner is, in fact, a wealthy privileged white man. Why? Because, at the end of the day, I’m pretty sure that there are many people, who unlike Bruce Jenner, lack the financial resources to follow through with such a change. So as much as we celebrate Bruce Jenner for his courage, it’s important to understand, that there are millions out there who may be just as courageous, who sit at the lowest rung on the ladder of privilege, who are fighting internal struggles with sexuality and identity as we speak. That said, maybe while Bruce Jenner still has a penis for now at least, it might not be a bad idea to tell the stories of less privileged people.

Bruce Jenner
Bruce Jenner

It’s sad that we look to celebrity to amplify societal issues. I hate that it’s that way, but it’s the way that it is. That said, at least for now, aren’t you glad that Bruce Jenner still has a penis, because, of course, that’s the burning question everyone seems to want to know. Which isn’t that bad considering that he’s the father of Kylie Jenner, the young socialite credited for convincing young girls to suck air out of shot glasses in an attempt to get their lips bigger, because of course, cultural appropriation is the new thing. Thanks to Bruce Jenner’s daughter Kylie, “the poors” won’t have to spend much for aesthetic changes to their bodies, even as ridiculous as it sounds.

In the end, I applaud Bruce Jenner for having the courage to do what’s comfortable, and best for him. Whether we fully understand his choice is a subject for debate and education. At the end of the day, his choice is as revolutionary much like coming out of the closet, and should be applauded. Whether you respect his choice isn’t and shouldn’t be a concern. But, hey, that’s just me being a black man trapped in a black man’s body.